Hard to Hold review
2 November 2009 12:55 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
fencer_xMmk, let's get this Hard to Hold review rolling! I'll include links to all my scans here, but I'm not posting this until ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
daiki_dansu gets her Tsujimoto and big-ass T2 photosets scanned :D So grab what you can at the end of this post ^___^
I'm not sure if a DVD of this will be out or not (GOD I HOPE SO), but just in case for some strange reason you'd rather WAIT and not be spoiled, I'll place this write-up behind a cut :D
So, this play was really depressing. It definitely had its funny parts...but then, so did Dust and Switch and Aru Hi >__> You spent about a third of the time laughing, a third crying, and a third feeling really really awkward and naughty that you were watching boys do things like this live in front of you 8D;;;;
The show centered around a man named Aoshima, a former biology teacher and current investigative reporter for the magazine Hard to Hold, which specializes in uncovering the truth of unsolved crimes. The performance was very hard to keep up with, mostly because it took place in flashback form, but with crisscrossing timelines and multiple jumps back to the present, so it was like a mental puzzle to put together the actual timeline. I'm not sure if the performance itself benefited from this strange setup, but I know it kinda made my head hurt :P
The basic plot is that 1st year high schooler Hiiro (whose name means "scarlet"; played by Takasaki Shouta) has been found dead in an apartment he was secretly renting, and two people have come forward claiming responsibility for the death: Shimura (played by Tsujimoto Yuuki)--Hiiro's biology teacher who had been romantically involved with Hiiro and professed that they had planned to commit lovers' suicide together--and Midorikawa--Hiiro's personal tutor and a scientist at a laboratory that experimented on animals, who confessed he murdered Hiiro by drugging him. Aoshima, who you learn was Hiiro's biology tutor before Shimura and who left his post for reasons unknown, is investigating this murder/suicide/who knows.
Through the flashbacks, you learn what kind of person Hiiro was, and what kind of relationships he had with those around him. Aoshima reflects back on the first time he met Hiiro--after school, when he spotted Hiiro coming out of an empty classroom. When he confronts Hiiro about what he was doing in the classroom, Hiiro gives him a wicked little smile, wipes something from his lips, and says, "Something that happens a lot in all-boys' schools..." Yep. Hiiro's a little manslut.
Through subsequent interactions, though, Aoshima learns of a different side to Hiiro--Aoshima, as the new biology teacher, is planning on resurrecting the school's astronomy club, and Hiiro loves astronomy. They spend many hours together refurbishing an abandoned classroom to look like a planetarium, all the while getting closer. Though Aoshima doesn't realize it, Hiiro has developed something of a crush on him, evidenced by little things, such as asking to have a special keitai strap that he spots Aoshima carrying around, which has a beautiful little red jewel attached to it. They discuss, in one scene, life and loneliness. Hiiro compares himself to the stars--alone and cold and far away in the distant space. Aoshima corrects him saying, even though the stars are far away and alone, they understand and accept this, and shine brightly to let others know of their existence, like calling out in the hopes that someone will hear. It is their job as astronomers to hear the stars' voices and know that they exist. Hiiro asks him, "...Will you hear my voice, and find me?" to which Aoshima responds he will.
Some time later, you see Aoshima packing his desk. He's resigned his post at the school abruptly--and you realize it is because of rumors about him being involved with a student. While this isn't true, he would rather remove himself from the school than risk further damaging the student's--Hiiro's--image. Hiiro is furious, and you hear his last words to Aoshima--"You idiot! I hate you! I never want to see you again!"
Fast forward a few months, and a new biology teacher has come to the school--Shimura. He's very energetic and passionate about his subject, but you also see that he's...quite psychologically disturbed. While on the surface, in front of others, he's gentle and caring and always smiling, he lives with his mother at home, who is constantly comparing him to his dead father, lecturing him to become a better man.
Shimura first meets Hiiro during a break, when he's walking outside and spots Hiiro sleeping underneath a sakura tree. Entranced by his form, he walks up, and Hiiro wakes and asks him strange, child-like questions: Why do elephants have big ears? Why do giraffes have long necks? Why do rabbits have red eyes? This third question--Why do rabbits have red eyes?--is a recurring theme throughout the show. Hiiro asks it of all those he's connected to; whenever anyone gives him a straight, scientific answer, he responds that no, rabbits have red eyes because they lost a loved one, and their eyes are red from crying so much. Their eyes are red--hiiro, just like his name.
Shimura and Hiiro get closer, with Shimura becoming something of a tutor to Hiiro, until eventually their relationship turns romantic, and they start dating (well, as much as a teacher and a student can date). You see more of Shimura's not-so-stable side surface in random instances: he finds Hiiro in the old astronomy club room one evening, and picks up his cellphone to see the strap from the now-absent Aoshima. He returns the phone to Hiiro, but takes off the strap, explaining, "This strap's really old. You don't need it anymore, right?" Hiiro is furious and struggles to get the strap bike, inflaming Shimura's jealousy.
In another scene, Hiiro and Shimura are talking on the phone, and Hiiro is whining about Shimura cancelling a date where they'd planned on going to see a movie and having dinner together, but Shimura explains that his mother got sick and he has to take care of her--and all the while, his mother is complaining to him to get off the phone, asking who he's talking to, until Shimura snaps and yells at her to shut up. When he gets off the phone, he laments to no one that he wasn't the only one disappointed, he really did want to go to the movies with Hiiro...and then he sits at his desk and starts stabbing a book with some scissors over and over again >_>
On a personal note, I was really torn between feeling sorry for Shimura--because in one monologue, he described his feelings for Hiiro as feeling like he was completely swallowed up, that Hiiro was his whole world, that he needed Hiiro; he really really loved the guy, but in an obsessive, desperately needful way--and being really creeped out by him. Tsujimoto pulled off both sides so perfectly, I'm always amazed. Really, Oishi is just not a challenging role at all for him; it was such a breath of fresh air to see him in a role that had so many different sides, that required so much effort to portray well.
You see more of Shimura's jealous side come out in a scene where Hiiro comes home to his apartment late one evening to find Shimura already there, watching TV. They have some cute flirting for a few moments, before Shimura pauses, and steps forward until he's really close to Hiiro, their noses almost touching. He looks down, and then presses his face into Hiiro's neck, taking in a deep breath. "...You smell like alcohol and cigarettes...where have you been?" Hiiro, for all his "worldly" experiences, is really quite naive, and brushes off Shimura's worry, laughing when he realizes that Shimura's jealous he's been hanging out with other guys, which Shimura splutters quite adorably that he's very much not jealous, really (note that this scene took place pretty early on in the show--before you realized Shimura's kinda cuckoo. Here, it was just really really sexy and cute *___*)
You're also introduced to Midorikawa-sensei, a scientist whom Hiiro's mother has hired to tutor Hiiro. He seems to be a reasonably level-headed guy. Your stereotypical yaoi-manga creepy scientist, soft-spoken, v.v.v. hot. Hiiro asks him at one point if there are animals in his laboratory, to which he responds that there are. "Don't you ever get attached to them, and feel sorry when they die?" Not really, Midorikawa responds--after all, they're dying for a greater purpose, and it's his job to decide that purpose, the value of their life. Hiiro then asks, "So then you can decide what my life is worth too, huh?" innocently, to which Midorikawa responds he will, but he will need Hiiro to swear it--which he does.
The final scenes of the play describe Shimura's and Midorikawa's confessions of what happened the night Hiiro died.
Midorikawa explains that he came to Hiiro's apartment with a bottle of wine to celebrate...something I've forgotten. Hiiro thanks him, and invites him in to talk. Midorikawa obliges, and explains that he's brought some supplements for Hiiro to take, because he noticed him looking a bit pale recently. Hiiro thanks him again, and downs the pills immediately. The two chat for a bit longer, and Hiiro starts to feel strange. Midorikawa reminds him of his swearing to let Midorikawa decide what his life was worth, and says Hiiro will help Midorikawa accomplish what he's been striving for years to do: develop a way to kill something without marring it in any way whatsoever. Hiiro collapses to the floor, writhing, and Midorikawa watches, explaining that it shouldn't be painful, that this is all for the good of his research...until eventually Hiiro stills and is dead.
The scene then switches over to Shimura, who has come to Hiiro's apartment to talk. Hiiro invites him in, and offers him some wine that he got from some neighbors. Hiiro then confesses that he'll be moving out of the apartment soon. He'd been on bad terms with his mother since his parents' divorce, but lately they've been getting along better, and he's going to drop out of school to be home-schooled (his mother is a teacher) and move back in with her. He wants to take charge of his life, to get out of this rut and move on, and begs for Shimura's support in this. However, something snaps inside of Shimura, who feels like he's been taken advantage of--it's the final straw in feeling like a migawari (replacement), with his mother first and now with Hiiro. Hiiro begs him to understand, but Shimura attacks him, knocking him to the floor on his back, and straddles him to hold him down, placing his hands on Hiiro's neck and choking off the air until Hiiro stops struggling, dead. He leans down until their faces are almost touching and whispers, "I love you, Hiiro..." He then confesses that they'll be able to be together again very soon, and pulls out a cutter, obviously intent on committing suicide himself.
The scene then switches back to the present, and Aoshima has finished his investigation, still unsure of who really killed Hiiro. He finds himself in front of the apartment where Hiiro was found, and lets himself inside. It's empty...except for a letter sitting on a desk. It's addressed to him, and he opens it.
Hiiro talks in the letter about his life, his dreams, and all he felt for Aoshima. He confesses that he's still a child right now, but he wants to grow up more, to explore the world, and then to bring it all back to Aoshima. He ends the letter once again asking Aoshima to find him again in the future. Aoshima is struck dumb, realizing what feelings Hiiro had for him, and that he himself felt those same feelings. That the entire purpose of the "investigation" was to lead him to this truth, that that was his own fate.
...THE END.
Yes, I know. WHAT THE FUCK? WHAT THE FUCK? No--I still have NO CLUE how Hiiro really died (and umm, Tsuji-chan: THAT'S NOT A LOVERS' SUICIDE. THAT'S AN ATTEMPTED MURDER-SUICIDE.) Meg and I figured maybe Midorikawa's drug only...like, knocked Hiiro out, and he woke up with no memory of it? And thought he'd gotten the wine from someone else? IDGI.
It was a really beautiful, sad play, though... I like these types of plays, personally, in small bits. And I don't like seeing the same actor play them over and over--I'M LOOKING AT YOU, NAGAYAMA-SAN--but...now and then, it's good to be really shaken by a show. And considering that there was all that dark material to do with forbidden love--whether between two men, student-teacher, whatever--it was doubly good 8D
And now the scans you've all been waiting for:
Download T2's pages from the pamphlet
Download more photos of Shouta than you could ever possibly need (read: 24)
Random final note: Baba apparently went to the dress-rehearsal (I would too, if I were a friend who didn't wanna be stuck in a teeny-tiny theater rubbing butts with fans XD;;;) and got an orange from Tsuji XD (there's a scene where Hiiro and Shimura are throwing an orange back and forth, and Shimura catches it on the final throw, then turns and gives it to a random member of the audience), cuuuuuuuuute 8D
Also cute was this:
翔太とか辻ちゃんとか皆で集まってハロウィンパーティしたら楽しそうだなぁ…なんて考えたのですが、
彼らは今、舞台『HARD TO HOLD』の本番中だったので諦めました…(≧ε≦)
I thought it'd be fun to get together with Shouta and Tsuji-chan and everyone else to have a Halloween party.........but they're in the middle of HARD TO HOLD performances so I gave up...(≧ε≦)
I LOVE THAT HE ESPECIALLY MENTIONED TSUJI AND SHOUTA. ILUSFM GOLDEN TRIO. Like, everyone else was an "everyone else" but Tsuji and Shouta are his buuuuuddies ;_;
(also, I gotta wonder how weird it was for him to watch Tsuji and Shouta in these roles 8D;;;just business as usual? A repeat of one-too-many times he walked in at the wrong moment? XDDDD)
daiki_dansu gets her Tsujimoto and big-ass T2 photosets scanned :D So grab what you can at the end of this post ^___^I'm not sure if a DVD of this will be out or not (GOD I HOPE SO), but just in case for some strange reason you'd rather WAIT and not be spoiled, I'll place this write-up behind a cut :D
So, this play was really depressing. It definitely had its funny parts...but then, so did Dust and Switch and Aru Hi >__> You spent about a third of the time laughing, a third crying, and a third feeling really really awkward and naughty that you were watching boys do things like this live in front of you 8D;;;;
The show centered around a man named Aoshima, a former biology teacher and current investigative reporter for the magazine Hard to Hold, which specializes in uncovering the truth of unsolved crimes. The performance was very hard to keep up with, mostly because it took place in flashback form, but with crisscrossing timelines and multiple jumps back to the present, so it was like a mental puzzle to put together the actual timeline. I'm not sure if the performance itself benefited from this strange setup, but I know it kinda made my head hurt :P
The basic plot is that 1st year high schooler Hiiro (whose name means "scarlet"; played by Takasaki Shouta) has been found dead in an apartment he was secretly renting, and two people have come forward claiming responsibility for the death: Shimura (played by Tsujimoto Yuuki)--Hiiro's biology teacher who had been romantically involved with Hiiro and professed that they had planned to commit lovers' suicide together--and Midorikawa--Hiiro's personal tutor and a scientist at a laboratory that experimented on animals, who confessed he murdered Hiiro by drugging him. Aoshima, who you learn was Hiiro's biology tutor before Shimura and who left his post for reasons unknown, is investigating this murder/suicide/who knows.
Through the flashbacks, you learn what kind of person Hiiro was, and what kind of relationships he had with those around him. Aoshima reflects back on the first time he met Hiiro--after school, when he spotted Hiiro coming out of an empty classroom. When he confronts Hiiro about what he was doing in the classroom, Hiiro gives him a wicked little smile, wipes something from his lips, and says, "Something that happens a lot in all-boys' schools..." Yep. Hiiro's a little manslut.
Through subsequent interactions, though, Aoshima learns of a different side to Hiiro--Aoshima, as the new biology teacher, is planning on resurrecting the school's astronomy club, and Hiiro loves astronomy. They spend many hours together refurbishing an abandoned classroom to look like a planetarium, all the while getting closer. Though Aoshima doesn't realize it, Hiiro has developed something of a crush on him, evidenced by little things, such as asking to have a special keitai strap that he spots Aoshima carrying around, which has a beautiful little red jewel attached to it. They discuss, in one scene, life and loneliness. Hiiro compares himself to the stars--alone and cold and far away in the distant space. Aoshima corrects him saying, even though the stars are far away and alone, they understand and accept this, and shine brightly to let others know of their existence, like calling out in the hopes that someone will hear. It is their job as astronomers to hear the stars' voices and know that they exist. Hiiro asks him, "...Will you hear my voice, and find me?" to which Aoshima responds he will.
Some time later, you see Aoshima packing his desk. He's resigned his post at the school abruptly--and you realize it is because of rumors about him being involved with a student. While this isn't true, he would rather remove himself from the school than risk further damaging the student's--Hiiro's--image. Hiiro is furious, and you hear his last words to Aoshima--"You idiot! I hate you! I never want to see you again!"
Fast forward a few months, and a new biology teacher has come to the school--Shimura. He's very energetic and passionate about his subject, but you also see that he's...quite psychologically disturbed. While on the surface, in front of others, he's gentle and caring and always smiling, he lives with his mother at home, who is constantly comparing him to his dead father, lecturing him to become a better man.
Shimura first meets Hiiro during a break, when he's walking outside and spots Hiiro sleeping underneath a sakura tree. Entranced by his form, he walks up, and Hiiro wakes and asks him strange, child-like questions: Why do elephants have big ears? Why do giraffes have long necks? Why do rabbits have red eyes? This third question--Why do rabbits have red eyes?--is a recurring theme throughout the show. Hiiro asks it of all those he's connected to; whenever anyone gives him a straight, scientific answer, he responds that no, rabbits have red eyes because they lost a loved one, and their eyes are red from crying so much. Their eyes are red--hiiro, just like his name.
Shimura and Hiiro get closer, with Shimura becoming something of a tutor to Hiiro, until eventually their relationship turns romantic, and they start dating (well, as much as a teacher and a student can date). You see more of Shimura's not-so-stable side surface in random instances: he finds Hiiro in the old astronomy club room one evening, and picks up his cellphone to see the strap from the now-absent Aoshima. He returns the phone to Hiiro, but takes off the strap, explaining, "This strap's really old. You don't need it anymore, right?" Hiiro is furious and struggles to get the strap bike, inflaming Shimura's jealousy.
In another scene, Hiiro and Shimura are talking on the phone, and Hiiro is whining about Shimura cancelling a date where they'd planned on going to see a movie and having dinner together, but Shimura explains that his mother got sick and he has to take care of her--and all the while, his mother is complaining to him to get off the phone, asking who he's talking to, until Shimura snaps and yells at her to shut up. When he gets off the phone, he laments to no one that he wasn't the only one disappointed, he really did want to go to the movies with Hiiro...and then he sits at his desk and starts stabbing a book with some scissors over and over again >_>
On a personal note, I was really torn between feeling sorry for Shimura--because in one monologue, he described his feelings for Hiiro as feeling like he was completely swallowed up, that Hiiro was his whole world, that he needed Hiiro; he really really loved the guy, but in an obsessive, desperately needful way--and being really creeped out by him. Tsujimoto pulled off both sides so perfectly, I'm always amazed. Really, Oishi is just not a challenging role at all for him; it was such a breath of fresh air to see him in a role that had so many different sides, that required so much effort to portray well.
You see more of Shimura's jealous side come out in a scene where Hiiro comes home to his apartment late one evening to find Shimura already there, watching TV. They have some cute flirting for a few moments, before Shimura pauses, and steps forward until he's really close to Hiiro, their noses almost touching. He looks down, and then presses his face into Hiiro's neck, taking in a deep breath. "...You smell like alcohol and cigarettes...where have you been?" Hiiro, for all his "worldly" experiences, is really quite naive, and brushes off Shimura's worry, laughing when he realizes that Shimura's jealous he's been hanging out with other guys, which Shimura splutters quite adorably that he's very much not jealous, really (note that this scene took place pretty early on in the show--before you realized Shimura's kinda cuckoo. Here, it was just really really sexy and cute *___*)
You're also introduced to Midorikawa-sensei, a scientist whom Hiiro's mother has hired to tutor Hiiro. He seems to be a reasonably level-headed guy. Your stereotypical yaoi-manga creepy scientist, soft-spoken, v.v.v. hot. Hiiro asks him at one point if there are animals in his laboratory, to which he responds that there are. "Don't you ever get attached to them, and feel sorry when they die?" Not really, Midorikawa responds--after all, they're dying for a greater purpose, and it's his job to decide that purpose, the value of their life. Hiiro then asks, "So then you can decide what my life is worth too, huh?" innocently, to which Midorikawa responds he will, but he will need Hiiro to swear it--which he does.
The final scenes of the play describe Shimura's and Midorikawa's confessions of what happened the night Hiiro died.
Midorikawa explains that he came to Hiiro's apartment with a bottle of wine to celebrate...something I've forgotten. Hiiro thanks him, and invites him in to talk. Midorikawa obliges, and explains that he's brought some supplements for Hiiro to take, because he noticed him looking a bit pale recently. Hiiro thanks him again, and downs the pills immediately. The two chat for a bit longer, and Hiiro starts to feel strange. Midorikawa reminds him of his swearing to let Midorikawa decide what his life was worth, and says Hiiro will help Midorikawa accomplish what he's been striving for years to do: develop a way to kill something without marring it in any way whatsoever. Hiiro collapses to the floor, writhing, and Midorikawa watches, explaining that it shouldn't be painful, that this is all for the good of his research...until eventually Hiiro stills and is dead.
The scene then switches over to Shimura, who has come to Hiiro's apartment to talk. Hiiro invites him in, and offers him some wine that he got from some neighbors. Hiiro then confesses that he'll be moving out of the apartment soon. He'd been on bad terms with his mother since his parents' divorce, but lately they've been getting along better, and he's going to drop out of school to be home-schooled (his mother is a teacher) and move back in with her. He wants to take charge of his life, to get out of this rut and move on, and begs for Shimura's support in this. However, something snaps inside of Shimura, who feels like he's been taken advantage of--it's the final straw in feeling like a migawari (replacement), with his mother first and now with Hiiro. Hiiro begs him to understand, but Shimura attacks him, knocking him to the floor on his back, and straddles him to hold him down, placing his hands on Hiiro's neck and choking off the air until Hiiro stops struggling, dead. He leans down until their faces are almost touching and whispers, "I love you, Hiiro..." He then confesses that they'll be able to be together again very soon, and pulls out a cutter, obviously intent on committing suicide himself.
The scene then switches back to the present, and Aoshima has finished his investigation, still unsure of who really killed Hiiro. He finds himself in front of the apartment where Hiiro was found, and lets himself inside. It's empty...except for a letter sitting on a desk. It's addressed to him, and he opens it.
Hiiro talks in the letter about his life, his dreams, and all he felt for Aoshima. He confesses that he's still a child right now, but he wants to grow up more, to explore the world, and then to bring it all back to Aoshima. He ends the letter once again asking Aoshima to find him again in the future. Aoshima is struck dumb, realizing what feelings Hiiro had for him, and that he himself felt those same feelings. That the entire purpose of the "investigation" was to lead him to this truth, that that was his own fate.
...THE END.
Yes, I know. WHAT THE FUCK? WHAT THE FUCK? No--I still have NO CLUE how Hiiro really died (and umm, Tsuji-chan: THAT'S NOT A LOVERS' SUICIDE. THAT'S AN ATTEMPTED MURDER-SUICIDE.) Meg and I figured maybe Midorikawa's drug only...like, knocked Hiiro out, and he woke up with no memory of it? And thought he'd gotten the wine from someone else? IDGI.
It was a really beautiful, sad play, though... I like these types of plays, personally, in small bits. And I don't like seeing the same actor play them over and over--I'M LOOKING AT YOU, NAGAYAMA-SAN--but...now and then, it's good to be really shaken by a show. And considering that there was all that dark material to do with forbidden love--whether between two men, student-teacher, whatever--it was doubly good 8D
And now the scans you've all been waiting for:
Download T2's pages from the pamphlet
Download more photos of Shouta than you could ever possibly need (read: 24)
Random final note: Baba apparently went to the dress-rehearsal (I would too, if I were a friend who didn't wanna be stuck in a teeny-tiny theater rubbing butts with fans XD;;;) and got an orange from Tsuji XD (there's a scene where Hiiro and Shimura are throwing an orange back and forth, and Shimura catches it on the final throw, then turns and gives it to a random member of the audience), cuuuuuuuuute 8D
Also cute was this:
翔太とか辻ちゃんとか皆で集まってハロウィンパーティしたら楽しそうだなぁ…なんて考えたのですが、
彼らは今、舞台『HARD TO HOLD』の本番中だったので諦めました…(≧ε≦)
I thought it'd be fun to get together with Shouta and Tsuji-chan and everyone else to have a Halloween party.........but they're in the middle of HARD TO HOLD performances so I gave up...(≧ε≦)
I LOVE THAT HE ESPECIALLY MENTIONED TSUJI AND SHOUTA. ILUSFM GOLDEN TRIO. Like, everyone else was an "everyone else" but Tsuji and Shouta are his buuuuuddies ;_;
(also, I gotta wonder how weird it was for him to watch Tsuji and Shouta in these roles 8D;;;
