fencer_x | PaniSuta Translation

Neon Protocol, the site I usually get my panisuta reports from, recently added this to her arsenol: THE VERY FIRST PANISUTA EVER YAAAAAY! It's long, it's hilarious, and it took me forever. ENJOY.

*pnish*’s first Panic Studio, on December 11, 2004

Tuti: All right~ everyone, it’s finally time!! This is *pnish*’s Panic Studio! First off, I’m one of the members, Tsuchiya Yuuichi!

Eiji: I’m Moriyama Eiji~ (Tuti: 『Gaju』)
Wasshi: I’m Washio Noboru~ (Tuti: 『Wasshi』)
Daiki: And I’m Sano Daiki~ (Tuti: 『........』)
Eiji: He refuses to say Leader.

So these are the four who’ll be bringing us Panic Studio. Then they introduce the group itself.

Tuti: And there are all these people in front of the studio to see us do this! I wonder how many are out there…

Eiji: Looks like about 1,000, don’t you think?

Tuti: We couldn’t see 1,000 people from the window!!

Tuti: Seeing as this is the first show, let’s have each member talk about what’s going to happen in the future! Now, who should we start with…

Daiki: Shouldn’t we do the faxes and stuff first…?

Tuti: Ah, right right! So yes, starting today we’ll be reading off faxes and greetings we get.

That’s Leader for you! They read off a few faxes, and just with the liveliness they read with something interesting happens:

Daiki: “Congratulations on starting your radio show. Unfortunately I can’t be there on the day it happens, so I’m going to watch from my compoter.”　

Compoter?!

Tuti: “Hello and greetings! Congratulations on the opening of radio *pnish*’s Panic Stujio…”

Stujio?! Stujio?!

Wasshi: That’s…not what it really says, is it?
Tuti: No…sorry!!

Moriyama-san has no problems reading his.

Wasshi: “Congratulations on your radio show. Tuti’s flower-design shirt is so cool!”
Tuti: What does that have to do with anything?!
Eiji: She must be new.

At last they started the member introduction, and first up was Leader:

Daiki: I’m 175cm tall, weigh 58 kg. My blood type is O, I’m an Aquarius, I’m 25 years old—and I’m Leader♪
Tuti: O type and an Aquarius! You’re the same as me! What about Wasshi? What about Wasshi??
Wasshi: I’m an Aquarius too!
Tuti: Yeah but you’re AB aren’t you…
Daiki: Hey, sorry sorry—but this is my introduction!! Cut it out!
Eiji: O type…looks like it’s really…
Daiki: I said this is my introduction!!
Eiji: …popular.

Going at their own pace, huh. They talk some about the Casshern DVD, and guest performances (Zettai Ousama) .

Tuti: I’ve seen Zettai Ousama before—twice actually. It’s really good!
Daiki: Guess I’ve gotta work hard then…!
Eiji: Zettai Ousama…never seen it.
Tuti: If you haven’t seen it then don’t say anything!!
Eiji: I can say what I want!

Tuti: So, where are you from?
Daiki: I’m from Shizuoka prefecture!
Tuti: That’s right next to me—see I’m from Yamanashi prefecture—
Daiki: Tsuchiya-san, Tsuchiya-san! This is my introduction!! Don’t you have anything you want to ask me?!
Tuti: Hmm…then, how about an actor you admire?
Daiki: Well, there was an incident with this before, but Ishida Kazunari-san…
All: Aah…
Eiji: So—hey, Daiki-chan, why are you turning your back to the window when you talk?
Daiki: Because it’s my turn to speak!

At Daiki-chan’s request, they put on the song “Flower” by Orange Range. Apparently he recently went to see the movie, “I’m Coming To See You Now” (I believe that was the theme song to it)

Tuti: With Takeuchi Yuuko, and Nakamura Shidou…
Daiki: Yeah yeah yeah.
Tuti: Takeuchi Yuuko huh…
Apparently he’d gotten a ticket from her.
Eiji: You went to see it with a free ticket?!

Next we move on to Tsuchiya Yuuichi-sama.

Tuti: I’m *pnish*’s Tsuchiya Yuuichi, also known as HI TUTI DE~SU!!
Eiji: Aren’t you breaking up a little [from being so loud]?
Tuti: Am I? I might be a little too close… Umm, ok I’m 180 cm, from the southern Alps region of Yamanashi… Right now I’m appearing in the NHK Television program, “Machi e Tobidasou” I’m also in some other plays and musicals… And I’m an Aquarius, O type, born on February 6^th!
Eiji: Oh hey what’s with that—I heard O types were popular.
Tuti: You said that earlier already!!

Eiji: So, what exactly is an actor to you, Tsuchiya?
Tuti: An entertainer! There’s lots of lines of work, but with this you can leave something with those watching you.
Eiji: So in your mind, it’s pretty much based on the audience?
Tuti: Yes,Yes,Yes!! [T/N: in English XD]

Eiji: Oooh, that’s cool!!
Tuti: Yup yup, Whether or not you can leave the audience with something—that’s our line of work!!

Daiki: So as a Ghibli fan, what did you think of Howl’s moving Castle?
Tuti: Hmm…it wasn’t really as great as I’d hoped.
Eiji: So it was like Disney?

Then they talk for a little while (haha)

Eiji: So, who would you like to voice?
Tuti: The guy from Mononoke’s Tataraba… the one Nishimura-san did…
Eiji: Aah…
Tuti: You don’t even know it!
Eiji: That reminds me, yesterday Spirited Away was on—who would you want to be in that?
Tuti: No-Face, maybe?
Eiji: Oh yeah, you said you were good at that. I saw it for the first time yesterday thinking anyone could do it, man what a surprise!!
Tuti: Though I’m the only one who says I’m actually good!

After that was some Warai no Daigaku talk

Eiji: And Tsuchiya, you really like going to film festivals huh…
Tuti: I do.
Daiki: And you can really talk a lot about them!
Tuti: I definitely can～～～～～ I can definitely talk a lot!
Wasshi: So how about we go with the song Tsuchiya chose next?
Tuti: Man I got to talk a lot for the first time in a while~

Van Halen’s “Can’t Stop Loving You”

Wasshi: So with that, seeing as this is the first of *pnish*’s weekly radio shows, Panic Studio, we’re doing member introductions!
Eiji: Good job～!

Wasshi: So…about my introduction… (in a tiny voice)
Tuti: Want me to do it?
Eiji: Can he handle it～?
Wasshi: I’m Washio Noboru, 179 cm, AB blood type, Aquarius, born on February 8^th. I’m not really good at talking, but lately I’ve been doing some singing. I’m 27 years old.
Tuti: There are probably people who’ve noticed this already, but I was born on February 6^th, so with Wasshi on the 8^th we’re only two days apart!
Daiki: And I’m on January 22^nd! Aquarius!
Eiji: Eeh, so you’re all Aquarius, huh…
Tuti: Yup, so we’re all three really good friends.
Eiji: …But you don’t look it at all (like you’re all Aquarius).
Tuti: …Who the hell would think someone LOOKS their sign?!

Wasshi: And the performance overlaps with my birthday, too (performance = Monster Box)
Eiji: Not with yours!
Wasshi: It’ll be at the after-party, so don’t you forget!

Monster Box announcements, and then a talk about how “monster” sounds like “mon-suta” (the word for the gate in front of the studio)

Wasshi: Umm, sorry—could we get back to me now…?
Tuti: A question, huh…so, Wasshi—what’s your favorite movie out of all the ones you’ve seen so far?
Wasshi: I get asked that a lot, but Perfect World. I saw it back in middle school, and bawled the whole time.
Tuti: I also cried when I first saw it, but sorry—I’ve seen it so many times I’m tired of it.
Eiji: How could you say something like that in front of Wasshi when he loves it…!?
Daiki: I’ll bet he’d like you to drop dead now.

Tuti: Ok then, what about plays you’ve seen?
Wasshi: I like Michigaku-sensei’s. (Sake-bocchan)
Tuti: Oh I was just in that.
Eiji: Then what was that, “Hallelujah!”
Tuti: Why are you leaning in close to the mic to say that??
Eiji: So what was that, “Hallelujah”?
Wasshi: Eh, it’s fine, isn’t it?
Eiji: He’s slipping!!
Daiki: Then what was that, “Geez, I can’t take it any more!”
Wasshi: Huh? What’s that from?
Daiki: Geez, drop dead, all of you!!

Tuti: So Wasshi, what kinds of plays do you like?
Wasshi: The other day I did my first musical FIVE, but if I’m going to do a play, I’d rather do a natural, serious play.
Eiji: So, what about WashiWashi (from Panic Age)?
Wasshi: Aah…….I’m not really good with that…
Eiji: There aren’t many who could really pull off that kind of role. You’d need to be an otaku really.
Tuti: There are lots of strong characters in *pnish* huh. Strong faces.
Eiji: Thick beards.
Tuti: Like you’re one to talk.

Eiji: So if you hadn’t been an actor, what would you have wanted to be?
Wasshi: A film maker maybe, or a cameraman. (from his days in staff school)

We end with Moriyama Eiji～

Eiji: You see for me…it’s been about 10 years now since I started acting.
All: Oooh…
Tuti: Wait wait, so that means out of all of us, you’ve had the most acting experience?
Eiji: Dunno.
Tuti: I’ve had about 6 now…
Eiji: Wait, no I’ve had about 6, too, when I think about it…
Tuti: Ha!
Wasshi: So…what were you doing for the other 4?
Eiji: Sorry sorry, I was just saying something relevant. (haha) That’s basically what I am—a relevant person. I’ll say things that pertain to the current topic. And I actually have an announcement to make… We have a magazine here…『Lot ＆Numbers – Original Sure Way to Win』 (no longer running) I’ll be writing a column in here.
Tuti: A column—! Moriyama-san, you’re going to write an article?
Eiji: I am—and what’s more, all handwritten!!
Tuti: Wait, no no no, I understand what you mean when you say “handwritten,” but…it’s not actually going into the magazine handwritten, right?
Eiji: Right.
Tuti: Geez, what the heck is with you.
Eiji: Hey, I only just bought an eraser recently!
Tuti: Well you don’t write that often.
Eiji: It’s not that I don’t write, I just don’t write the same thing too often. Erasing, writing, it’s like, “Aah, so this is what being a writer’s about huh…” I’m really basically an old-fashioned guy. It’s not that I can’t use a computer, it’s just that I don’t.
Tuti: But you’ve actually got one, right? You go online and all?
Eiji: Yeah, I’ve got one, but the other day it got broken. I can’t move anything around.

A short talk about Lot/Numbers.

Eiji: Yeah, but I lost.
Wasshi: You seem like the lucky type, though, Eiji.
Tuti: He’s got great gambling luck!
Eiji: I haven’t done Lot or Numbers much before, but I think I’m gonna take this chance to look into it.
Tuti: Moriyama the Gambler!
Eiji: Ask me anything you want to know about Lots. And Numbers, too!
Tuti: There you go!
Eiji: And the column, too!
Wasshi: That’s a little…

Daiki: How much do you get if you win Lots?
Tuti: Top prize is 100,000,000 yen, right?
Daiki: WHAT?!
Eiji: For 6 lots, it’s 100 million, for Mini Lots it’s about 10 million.
Tuti: And what about that carry over—carry over thing?
Eiji: Aah, the carry over, huh?
Tuti: …You don’t know what I’m talking about at all! I’m sitting here trying to remember it even!
Eiji: Sorry, but this is my introduction, see.

Tuti: All right then, should I do Moriyama-san’s introduction? Now, you see, Moriyama-san, sometimes he’ll say weird things, and then I—I like to write them down for later.
Eiji: Yeah you’re kind of an otaku like that.
Daiki: That’s gross.
Tuti: Now, a while back we had this performance, Panic Age （2004/5公演）
Eiji: Aah, oh yeah, that long thing.
Tuti: Right right. Yeah. Anyways, the other day we were all four talking about that, and it looked like Moriyama-san wanted to talk about Shimozaki-san, cause even though he was a supporting character he had a lot of scenes, so he was saying Shimozaki-san was, “The lead supporting role,” and no one understood!（referencing everyone listening）Are they getting this?
Eiji: You just didn’t understand what I meant!
Daiki: So, the song Moriyama-san chose is…!
Eiji: We’re going to commercial now??

The song is what he sang at the TeniMyu auditions, Sharan Q’s “Single Bed” The song ends, and the talk turns to recent Christmas songs

Tuti: No matter where you go it’s nothing but Christmas songs!
Eiji: But looking at your clothes today it’s kind of…
Tuti: Fall-ish, right? Brown…and red…
Eiji: Did you really have to say it in English?
Tuti: Aka and cha!!

Daiki: It’s already Christmas huh…this year’s almost over.
Tuti: Yup. It’s New Year’s Eve, Doraemon! Kinda like that.
Eiji: Seeing as it’s Christmas and all I kinda wanna have some hotpot at home.
Daiki: Can you?
Eiji: Yup. Actually the other day I bought a portable stove to use for hotpot.
Daiki: I’ve got one too—and Wasshi too.
Eiji: Right? Right? I didn’t have one before!!
Tuti: Well congratulations on your new stove! Now you’ve gotta use it!!
Eiji: First time this Christmas!
Daiki: Come over to my place on Christmas and we’ll cook together!
Eiji: Well if it’s for the first time on Christmas it doesn’t matter too much there I do it.
Tuti: So what do you put in your pot?
Daiki: How about we all say on three?

1—2—!
All: ??????鍋 (Can’t tell what anyone’s saying)

Eiji: Wasshi, you didn’t say anything!!
Wasshi: Well I wanted to say kimchi, but how are kimchi and chige different?
Eiji: You know, it doesn’t really matter what you say…
Tuti: I’m chicken!
Eiji: I’m kimchi.
Daiki: Me too. Tsuchiya, you really like doing different things from other people, huh?

Eiji: All right then, on Christmas we’ll all have kimchi hotpot at my place…
Daiki: Really?? I’m gonna look forward to that then!
Eiji: All right then (haha)

Daiki: You know lately I’ve been going over to Eiji’s place a lot!
Eiji: Yep, I’ll bet you’re gonna come over again today, too.
Tuti: Ahahaha!
Daiki: I even brought my cellphone charger and everything!

The talk turns to Christmas lights.

Tuti: The other day, I was watching TV see, and this year there’s gonna be blue lights!
Daiki: That diode thingee？
Tuti: Right!

Talking about LEDs

Eiji: Over in Roppongi and all?
Tuti: And in Shibuya too, there’s lots of pretty places.
Eiji: But the prettiest place of all…is my place.
Tuti: What, do you have lights on your house or something?
Eiji: Well it’s just the stove right now…but after that I’m gonna put up lights aaaallll over, and—
Tuti: Then say that AFTER you’re done!
Daiki: Wow I’m DEFINITELY going to Eiji’s place now! I wanna see these lights!
Tuti: Are you an idiot or something?

Cut to a song, “Christmas Song” by Mariah Carey. Song ends.

Daiki: Hmm, every time I hear Christmas songs it really gets me in that mood you know…
Eiji: Makes you wanna come over to my place more and more, huh?
Daiki: I’d go even if I hadn’t heard any songs!
Tuti: I can feel it getting closer, Moriyama-san’s house.

After some Monster Box information and magazine announcements, the show ended.